


Remember My Name

by hanjiszoe



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Angst, Backstory, Childhood Friends, Fluff and Angst, Nen (Hunter X Hunter), Reader-Insert, Slow Burn, Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-16 00:55:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29323563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hanjiszoe/pseuds/hanjiszoe
Summary: After not seeing him for almost seven years, you meet each other again by pure coincidence, both having different goals. You agree to help one another in hopes of sticking to your mission, saving your brother. But of course, things get complicated and never go as planned.This story is going to take place during the dark continent expedition/succession contest arc, meaning there will be some manga spoilers. This is a reader-insert so things will be in more limited perspectives, specifically the readers and the troupes perspective - not covering the entirety of the arc and not everything being canon! There will also be a lot of backstory for the reader.
Relationships: Kuroro Lucifer | Chrollo Lucifer/Reader
Kudos: 15





	1. What Do They Know?

There you sat, in the same spot you had had been sitting for what felt like hours. Not having a chance to think through what had happened over these past couple of days. No. These past couple of years. 

Just five days ago you killed your mother. Of course, it was no easy thing to do, because after all this time you still had love for her. The bitter pill to swallow was that your mother, Mari, never loved you and died despising you. 

You were staying in an apartment in YorkNew City, choosing this city out of pure impulse, but this would come to be in your favor later. It was a fairly small studio apartment, paint chipping off the walls, dust on every surface, and the kitchen, bedroom, and living room all in the same small, confined space. The good part about the place was the large windows that gave a view of the city. The business of the city made you feel safer than you had had felt in a long time, after being in such an isolated environment for so long. 

The next course of action was finding your brother, which was never an easy task either. You had not seen him personally in almost fourteen years, but you had done some research and it took less than a day to find out he used to be a part of the Zodiacs, being none other than Pariston Hill. You started to put the pieces together and knew that he was most likely was going to be boarding the Black Whale, departing in one month. You didn’t care what it would take to get on that boat, whatever reason he was boarding it could not be good, he always made crazy decisions ever since you were children. Going to the dark-continent was practically a death wish, no one on that boat was probably ever coming back.

Trying to find a way on there was going to be a back-breaking task since you had most of what was left of the NGL Association coming after you, reasoning for this to be explained later. For now, you made sure your name was not under this association on any hunter website, but rather associating your name with the word assassin. Setting up a good reputation through hunter websites was going to be a good start at getting connections to important people, specifically people who could help get you onto the Black Whale. Without using a real name, you created ways for people to hire you as an assassin or as just a guard of any kind. You were no certified hunter, meaning some hacking had to be done. You were no expert with computers, but with some simple internet searches and common sense, you did what you could

“Alright, now all I need is a job, and then it begins.” Sighing deeply, you posted the profile and leaned back on the couch, just waiting. Of course, there wasn’t going to be an offer within seconds, but you were eager. The plan was to take a job from an individual with importance, making your price not money, but a ticket on that boat. Only someone of importance or high power would be able to pay that kind of price, someone skilled. 

You moved your hand to close the laptop, but then you heard a noise come from the laptop, a job offer. “Already? It’s probably nothing good..” You immediately clicked on the message, scanning it very carefully. It read:

 **A group of mine needs a guard, a guard specifically that has excellent combat skills. You would be watching over our boss 24/7 and would eventually fend off the dangerous individual that is after him. If you are in YorkNew City meet us for more information tomorrow at the main cafe on Continental Street. No need to know our appearances, we will find you.**

You squinted your eyes, actually considering this weird, vaguely written offer. It is in no way professionally written, but it catches your eye. You most certainly have no intentions of doing anything for the mafia or anything related to that, but what if it's not the mafia? What if it is a group of really important people? But what if it is the NGL association and they found you? What if it is just a creep that sends this to any posted offer on this site? These kinds of thoughts paraded your mind for hours, but you were so desperate that none of these cons seemed to matter. 

“What the hell is wrong with me.” Putting your hands over your face, you knew it was already decided that you were going to that cafe. Everything about this was shady, but saving Pariston's life was the only thing you could think about, you had to try. 

-

The cafe was crowded as expected, which made you feel more relieved from the idea that a potential mafia leader could be coming to kill you at any moment (dramatic, but possible). You were not sure what you were supposed to do exactly, so you just ordered something small and took a seat outside. The area where you sat was near the side of the building next to a wall, it was very quiet and secluded, an area that could barely be seen, perfect for the occasion. It was time for you to set aside all of the fears and doubts that filled your mind and make sure that you were the one in charge in this interaction, or to try to be. 

Your back was against the crowd, meaning you could not see anyone, doing this made you seem less edgy. You just assumed they would come to you first, if they were skilled enough, they would be able to find you with the little information they had. While flipping through a newspaper — found at the door of the cafe — you felt a sudden pinch under your chin. Without tensing up too much, you began to slowly move your eyes down to see where the feeling was, noticing that there was a knife slightly touching the front of your neck. What a way to greet someone. 

“Is this any way to greet your new babysitter?” You smirked and just sat still, still holding the newspaper in your hands, waiting for a response. You knew there was still a small chance this could be the people that were after you, but your instincts said it’s not. They were reckless people, this felt different. “We never said you’d be hired on the spot, don’t get too ahead of yourself girl.” The knife slowly moved from your neck and you were able to turn around. 

Only two men were standing in front of you. The first man was tall with blonde hair, he had no visible eyebrows and was wearing a green and white tracksuit. The second guy was extremely short with black hair that matched his long-sleeved outfit. A mask was covering half of his face, he looked slightly irritated, but the mask made it hard to tell. The outfits they were wearing, the way they looked, they were just out of the ordinary from everyone else around. You were wearing a black turtle neck with a black, formal coat over top, with tan, high-waisted pants the bottom of them just barely reaching your boots. This was just casual attire for you, but you felt more ordinary looking than the men standing in front of you, would they not take you seriously? You were not sure if you was supposed to recognize them or not, you had only just gotten to YorkNew City, but you held together your composure. 

“How were you able to pick me — out of _all_ of these people — without any specific information about me? Very impressive.” You crossed your arms and sat back in the chair, not wanting them to sense any type of unease. The taller man squinted his eyes and began to leer, while the tiny man just kept the same blank stare. 

“I said we would find you, and we did. No need to elaborate on how. My main concern is why I’ve never heard about or seen you for someone with such a ‘reputation’ online.” 

“Why would you offer me a job then? Something must have caught your eye? Maybe the fact that you’ve never heard of me makes me an even better candidate for the job.” You were even more interested now, we all had suspicions about one another, but we all chose to come to the cafe anyway. A long grin grew on your face, knowing that you were as interesting to them as they were to you. 

“Are you even a certified hunter? Do you even actually know what it takes to fight someone as good as the Phantom Troupe?” His tone was condescending, he was underestimating you so directly. Raising your eyebrows, you just said nothing, implying that you had no clue what he was talking about, the offer said nothing mentioning the Phantom Troupe. Were you going to be fighting them? Guarding them? Even so, nothing has changed, you were willing to do anything to get what you wanted.

“Wait a second… do you not know who we are?” The tall man raised his voice and began looking displeased. 

“Am I supposed to? You guys don’t take me as big celebrities, and you don’t seem to be ver-“ 

“Let’s leave.” The short man finally speaks and starts to turn around, why was knowing who they were such a big deal? 

The blonde put his hand on his shoulder to stop him from turning. “No Feitan, not yet. She has to be teasing us, right?” You picked up on the short ones name being Feitan but decided not to comment on it at the time. 

“Look, I know that the Phantom Troupe is a bunch of famous thieves, but that’s _all_ I know. I don’t see how the affects the job, though. If your egos are that big, I guess I can get down on both knees and beg for the job?” You began to laugh at your comment and the tall man's eyes widened, you might have gone too far, but he seemed to like the bluntness. 

“What rock have you been living under? You are one strange girl, but I guess you’re right, it doesn’t matter. Well, I hope you know what you’re doing — it’s not our problem if you die on the job. Our boss isn’t even aware we’re doing this, which means he still has to approve of you anyways.” What just happened? Why did he suddenly give you the job even though you offended him? You didn’t even have to talk yourself out of it? They began walking away, implying you were to follow. 

Things were only beginning to feel more and more suspicious, you were just going to help a gang of ruthless thieves? This went against your morals completely, or so you would like to think. You never stopped to think how hypocritical it was to judge criminals considering your actions these past couple of years. Being no different than them if you were willing to help them kill someone for your benefit — a ticket to that boat. 

-  
The three of you began walking away from the cafe, you following along-side them to the Troupe hideout to meet the boss. Many doubts clouded your mind, this was something you hated most about yourself. You were always holding yourself back until you couldn’t anymore, you wished you could stop overthinking things and not only be impulsive when decisions needed to be on the spot. It wasn’t until your life depended on it that you could be strong-willed and make impulsive, fast choices. 

“I noticed your name is Feitan… so what is your name if you don’t mind me asking?” You nudged the tall man, names were always important to you and you had been itching to ask them this entire time. 

“Hah, my name is Phinks, and what is your real name? I’m guessing the one you gave online was false.” 

“Of course it was false! My real name is [name].” You were starting to feel better about this, if they were willing to give out names already, maybe they weren’t so bad? “Well, Feitan and Phinks, would you mind telling me why a gang of thieves needs the help of some random assassin? It’s hard to steer away from the conclusion I’m being walked into a trap.” You weren’t afraid to shout out doubts now, if you were going to take a risky job, you needed more information. 

“Relax, we will tell you more once we introduce you to our boss. If you suck at your job you can go ahead and consider it a death trap, this enemy is no one to play around with.” Phinks elbowed you, giving a snooty laugh, continuing to walk along with Feitan. It seemed they did not think you had what it takes to fight their enemy, but were stringing you along anyway. Picking up on this — you were preparing to prove them wrong, no matter who the enemy was. 

“You saw what I ask for in return, right? It’s not just money or any treasure you can steal — it’s something I need in less than a month.” You flattened your eyebrows, “I don’t give a shit who the enemy is, this will be _done_ before the month is over, so you better make sure you’re going to be able to pay up.” Neither of them turned around or said anything, they continued leading you to the hideout, you hoped this meant they understood. 

Minutes later the three of you arrived near abandoned, torn apart buildings. Traveling farther into them, you began to see some candles lighting the way, you were getting closer. 

Phinks and Feitan let you walk in front of them and guided you to the room a couple of feet ahead. As you took a step into the room you noticed multiple individuals were in the room surrounding you. While observing all of them, someone began to speak, making you freeze in your tracks. You recognized that voice, but from where? 

“Feitan? Phinks? Where have you guys been? Who is this?” Everyone looked towards you, but you kept your face toward the ground. You began to raise your head steadily to face the man who had just spoke and couldn’t believe who was standing in front of you. 

“Chrollo!?” You raised your voice a bit and said his name in a strangely excited tone. It’s none other than your old childhood best friend, Chrollo Lucilfer.


	2. Year of Silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You reunite with Chrollo and take the job, meaning you get to spend the next couple of weeks with him.

“Chrollo!?!” You didn’t mean to, but you practically yelled his name across the room, confusing everyone. Without thinking, you began running towards Chrollo, giving no one in the room time to react. You opened up your arms and practically slammed your body into his, nearly knocking him over. You wrapped your arms around his body in an instant, holding on tightly. Feitan began moving, ready to grab you after what you had just done, but Chrollo raises his hand to stop anyone from touching you. What you did was impetuous — embracing what was known to be such a powerful person — everyone in the room was still confused, how could you possibly know their boss?

After what felt like forever, you let go of him and took a step back. Looking into his eyes, finally breaking the silence, “Fuck. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be so intense, I just never expected to see you again! I-I had no clue you were the leader of the Phantom Troupe!” You threw your head back, laughing as if what had just happened was the funniest thing you’d ever seen.

Everyone in the room was still staring at you with shock, except for Chrollo. He knew exactly who you were, how could he forget?

You two met each other in Meteor City when you were just eight years old, him being age eleven. After losing your father, your mother threw you away to this hidden city, with no intentions of ever seeing you again. Paristons whereabouts were unknown during the time you lived in this city, he never came to find you, even knowing you were there. At age sixteen, Pariston eventually had people come collect you from the city, sending you off to a specific training program under the NGL Association, one that he had gone through himself. You had always despised the association because your father did, but your mother was devoted to serving them, influencing Pariston to feel the same. Thus, leaving no choice but to graduate from the six years of hell the program was. Yeah that’s right, six long years.

Your main goal now was to save Pariston from this ongoing war the association was creating, which would be no easy task with how concealed Pariston was towards you, and in general.

During your time in Meteor City, you and Chrollo became very close, depending on each other immensely. You knew him better than anyone at the time. You were the one person that always made him feel like he belonged somewhere, even in a city where no one belongs anywhere. You never left each others side until you were forcefully taken out of the city, never seeing one another until this moment. Meeting again by pure coincidence in your eyes, but Chrollo would see this as fate.

“I never expected to see you again either, [name].” Looking into his eyes, you could see he’s changed since the last time you had seen each other. They looked empty, and his whole demeanor was lifeless, like he had no care in the world. He was a bit more tense than usual after just losing Shalnark and Kortopi a few days ago, but you this was something you did not know.

You took a step forward and side smiled him — placing your right hand on his shoulder — you weren’t sure what had happened since you had been gone, but you knew it had to be a lot.

“I’m not taking no for an answer now, this job is mine. I just need to go grab a few things I’ll need from my apartment and I’ll be right back, try not to get yourself killed in the span of five minutes!” You said and then before anyone can say anything you were gone.

Nobody in the room even realized what had just happened, since the moment you stepped through the door they couldn’t sense any aura coming off of you, which was extremely strange. _Was the ability to teleport part of her nen ability? But wouldn’t someone have sensed it? Was she just really skilled at maintaining Zetsu?_

They all had these thoughts, but had even more questions about how you knew Chrollo.

With you suddenly gone, Phinks immediately began to babble on about how he had no idea you both used to know one another. He explained his whole plan was to just hire someone as a hidden distraction that their enemy would kill while they had time to come up with a plan, even though Illumi had just joined them.

“None of you could have known. I have never mentioned her to anyone prior.” Chrollo was unsure of how he felt about this. He’s was not supposed to care about anyone outside the troupe, and even then, any troupe member could be replaced. But seeing you again sparked some repressed feelings he couldn’t explain.

“I’m not sure we should allow her to do this, it's unnecessary.”

“Boss, do you care for her? Whatever happened then was then, but right now we need to find a way to kill him. She would be the per-“ Phinks is suddenly cut off by Chrollo, who seems to suddenly be irritated. Chrollo was always calm and collected, even in stressful situations, but right now something was off.

“I never said anything about caring about her, I just said I don’t think it’s necessary. We can find a solution without using a her as a ‘guard’ and getting her killed.” Human life was never on his list of priorities, he was starting to sound strange to them. “How much money does she need for this? Does she need a specific item? I can just give it to her and send her on her way.”

“She wants neither of those things, her price for this was a ticket to the Black Whale.” Feitan chimed in.

Chrollo's eyes widened and he placed one of his hands over the other — tensing up even more — _the boat going to the dark continent?_

“Why the hell does she want that?” Machi rises from the shadows, arms crossed, she had been angry ever since the loss of two of their members. She just wanted to kill their enemy and move on.

“Uh, I have my own reasons and it’s like I said, I will not take no for an answer, even if you can’t give me what I want. Consider it being the help of an old friend!” None of them had noticed you had returned back to the hideout, awhile ago actually. You only grabbed a couple things from your apartment, spending the rest of your time listening to their conversation. “But it’s still a job so… I’m hoping I get the payment still. Haha.”

“You have no idea who you’d be up against, do you know who Hisoka Morow is?” Nobunaga spoke up, finally saying what you had been waiting for, the name of their enemy.

You had definitely heard of him, most people have. You knew that he wouldn’t hesitate trying to kill you if you had interested him with your abilities, research could tell anyone that much. Hearing his name did not change your feelings, though. You didn’t even bat an eye hearing his name, but instead glared at Nobunaga for being the third person that day to underestimate you.

“I don’t care who he is, just cut the shit and give me the job.” You said this confidently, holding your head high and not caring what any of these people had to say, they had never seen your true ability anyway, what the hell did they know? “And if you’re wondering, no, teleportation is not my ability, but only a tiny part of what I can do.” You gave them all a cocky grin, enjoying being a mystery to them. There was nothing more satisfying than proving a room full of people who think you’re weak, wrong.

“Fine. If you are willing to give your life to protect us, that is your call.” Chrollo gave you a cold smile, slightly raising his eyebrows and looking blankly at you. Deep down he was not alright with this at all, he thought this was the worst possible idea. But he had to ignore whatever foolish feelings he had, you were not someone that was important to him anymore. Well, this is what he wanted to believe.

Chrollo finally giving in to letting you have the job made you smile like a child who was just given candy. You had missed him more than he could ever know, you had lost so much in such a short amount of time and being able to spend time with him again made you feel so happy you could barely breathe. Things had been so hectic in your life that you had not had much time to look for him after ‘graduating’ the NGL program, you focused more on locating your mother and brother in the past year.

“While I want to help protect you, this isn’t just about that. I’m actually counting on your help to get on that boat. I hope you know that.” Deep down, you knew this reunion would not last long, within a months time you both would go your separate ways. The fact that you two were old friends made you hold onto hope that he would return the favor. You were so excited you made it sound like you were giving out this job for free earlier.

“Still the same as always aren’t you… trusting strangers with your life.” He shook his head then turned away from you. He wasn’t wrong, but you did not consider him a stranger, you got the feeling you were considered as one.

Sitting down in his normal spot, he looked to the troupe, “She will be staying with me, the rest of you stay on your guard, Hisoka is aware this is a place we all meet. It would be smarter to leave this place as soon as possible.” And with that, everyone in groups of two or three, left the ruins of the building together, leaving just you and Chrollo.

You looked at him and observed all of his features, noticing the bandage-like thing wrapped around his head. What could possibly be under that, or is it just his style?

He was just looking down, not doing anything in particular, but you could sense an immense amount of stress from him. How was he able to remain so calm and collected?

“Are you alright? Everyone in your group seems to be on edge, I imagine the past couple of days have been hell for you all.” You broke the silence, prying into peoples thoughts as usual. He didn’t look up, he continued to sit there with hands interlaced, slightly slouching over. He had no intentions of making conversation with you, you took the hint and just took a seat on the ground where you were.

This was going to be an interesting couple of weeks, that was for sure.

-

Around two weeks had passed since the day you had reunited with Chrollo, and it was a very uneventful two weeks. He had barely said two words to you, you had just been following him around and learning his schedule from your own observations.

He didn’t seem to have a real home around here, you two had just stayed at different hotels he brought you to (with separate beds to note). Conversations between the two of you consisted of you talking non-stop and him giving one or two word replies. This was expected, but it was so boring, breaking past this hard shell of his was going to be much harder than you thought. But was there even a point to try when you would be parting ways in a couple weeks, though?

His schedule had usually just consisted of going to talk to people you had never seen, and of course talking with the troupe. He also spent a lot of time reading, which is something you tried to follow along on, but you would end up just falling asleep.

He had been talking with others to try and locate Hisoka, while also trying to find more information on the Black Whale. It made you feel relived he was actually going to help you. Even if he wasn’t going to speak to you while doing it.

Today went as it usually did, he got ready and left the hotel room, with you following along to wherever he went. This time you noticed you were both walking around the main part of YorkNew City, where he would usually stay out of the public eye — for obvious reasons.

“Any reason you’re just throwing yourself out in the open for Hisoka to find you?!” You whisper-screamed this to him while the both of you were walking in what was basically a massive crowd of thousands of people.

YorkNew City was always busy, it was mainly people walking around to go to the stands and little shops on the main strip. It was like he wanted something to happen or he wanted to give away his location. He just kept walking as you were asking a million questions, ignoring you. This caused you grab his sleeve to stop him. Turning to you, he looked you straight in the eyes, some people around you giving you both looks. Letting go of his sleeve, you took a step back, trying to take the attention away from the scene you were causing.

“Looks to me like you’re the only one making our location visible.” He gave you a slight side smirk, aware that this comment irritated you immensely.

You tilted your head and squinted your eyes at him, “Are you serious. The first real time you speak to me its to-“ You begin to ramble on, but he cuts you off by reaching out his hand to grab your shoulder.

“Calm down, [name]. Just follow me, I want to show you something.” He gives you a tiny laugh and then turns around, implying you are to keep following him.

Show you something? Why had his demeanor done a complete flip? After not really speaking to you or showing any attention toward your existence in two weeks, now he wanted to _show_ you something. He was such a difficult person to understand.

You sighed and just followed him, it was your job after all.

He eventually stopped right outside a coffee shop that was conjoined with a bookstore. It had a vintage-type of look to it and at first glance, you noticed there was a black cat sitting in the window that was covered in vines, sleeping. Never would you had expected Chrollo to be someone that drinks coffee while reading in a café in his free time, you were astonished.

He walked inside, the door making a ringing noise. The barista looked over at him and smiled, almost like she had seen him many times before.

“Do you want something? This place has a large menu.” He gave you a serious look, waiting on your response, but you were still standing there taking in that Chrollo Lucilfer was a café habitué.

“Just order me the same thing you get, I trust you!” You laughed and went to go grab you both a seat, the inside of the café was so unique and relaxing, this was definitely right up his alley.

The walls were an old, rustic brick, and there were over grown vines up and down the walls, along with other plants all around — hanging and sitting. There were tiny lamps on the tables and lights spread out on the walls, all having a warm lighting. The tables and chairs were an antique-looking wood, fitting the overall theme the building had. Towards the side of the store there was a wall with a large, open door, leading to a bookstore that also had a vintage theme, making the two stores fit together perfectly.

You had to admit, this place was incredible, but you were not used to going to places in the city like this, making it all new to you. You ended up choosing a table with one seat on each side, right beside the wall. The seat gave you a clear view of Chrollo, who was waiting in line to order for the both of you. It was cute seeing him — a leader of an infamous gang of thieves — wait in line to order coffee. You couldn’t help but smile while watching him, resting your hand under your chin. You were just pleased that he was finally not ignoring you all of a sudden, making you feel something was up.

He walked back to where you were sitting with two small cups on plates, both having a small heart design on top of them.

“Um, what is this?” Your eyes widened, you were honestly just mocking him a little bit.

“They are just plain vanilla lattes, she never adds a design like this, I don’t know why it has a heart.” He looked off to the side and took a drink, it seemed the barista was mocking him too, she assumed he was on a date with you. This made you start laughing again, you still didn’t understand what was happening.

“Is this what you wanted to show me? I never took you as someone who liked going to cafés. How… interesting!” You took a drink of the latte, this was the first time you had ever tried one, sadly. The first thing you tasted was the foam sitting on top, with a tint of vanilla flavoring. “This is great, sorry for laughing so much.” You looked up at him, it was probably going a little too far to mock him like that, he was opening up a little bit, showing you a place that _he_ enjoyed. It was rude to make assumptions about someone you hadn’t seen in such a long time.

“I’m aware it’s risky to be in such a public place, but you have limited time to do this job, right? I think it’s alright if he knows where we are, if he didn’t already know.” He took another drink of his latte and then suddenly places his hand on yours, not changing his serious expression. “I apologize for my coldness these past couple of weeks, some members of the troupe just died a short time ago and I have been trying to figure things out. I may have made it seem so, but you are no stranger to me, regardless of how long it’s been.” His words shock you, why was he suddenly being so kind?

“Well,” You make direct eye contact with him, it seems like he genuinely feels terrible, but you aren’t sure what to think. You know faked emotions when you see it, but his actions have your mind all over the place, “you’re forgiven I suppose.” The way you say this has a joking tone to it as always, he’s consistently serious, making you feel obligated to be the one to lighten the mood all the time.

You move your hand away from his, not being able to tell if this apology was forced to keep you as an ally or if he was feeling sorry for treating an ‘old friend’ with such frigidness. Pushing off this moment, you pretend to observe the coffee shop more, ever since you both were kids he was never good at picking up on social cues, so who knows if he had noticed you were now uncomfortable. 

“You know, if I ever make it out of all of this alive, I would love to run a place like this. This sounds silly, but I still dream of an ordinary life like I always used to. I’m no coffee expert, but having a place like this would be so… fun.”

It was true, when you lived in Meteor City, you would always create these ridiculous scenarios where you would live a standard life together and have no worries. He always seemed to love the idea of it, but that was a long time ago — he lives a different life now. Looking back at it, it was so unrealistic, especially with the _burdens_ you carry around with you now.

His eyes slightly widened at your statement, but he had no response. He’s understandably moved on from such absurd imaginations, most likely not believing in such a life is even possible anymore.

“[name], please tell me why you want to go on the Black Whale so badly.” He was doing what you were always good for doing, prying into someones business and trying to change the subject, he was not too keen on dwelling on the past. “Illumi tells me he can get you on that boat no problem, but what could possibly be on there for you?”

Was he concerned? People that traveled to the Dark Continent were known to never return, well most people anyway. All of the Zodiacs were going to be there from what you researched, and while you didn’t know if your brother was still one, there’s no way he would miss an opportunity to get involved in something so major.

“I believe my brother is going to be there and…. I want to find him. He’s the only family I have left and I’m afraid if I don’t go find him, I’ll never see him again.” You didn’t hide anything from him, for some reason you still trusted him with personal information, just spouting out your entire plan. You realized how stupid that was. “That’s all I’m gonna say. I think I’ve said too much. God.” You placed your hands over your face, the first chance you get to genuinely talk to someone in weeks, you apparently can’t stop. You’re probably looking less and less capable in his eyes.

“I see. Then we’d better hurry this job up then.” His eyes glanced down, making it seem like something was bothering him. He sighed and then stood up, giving you no chance to continue the conversation. “As much as I’d rather stay here for awhile, we’d better go. It’s not smart to stay in one place too long. And I’d hate for this place to take any damage because of my personal business.”

You stood up and began walking with him, taking one last glance at the beautiful café, knowing that was probably the last time you’d get to relax for a long time.

You and Chrollo began walking through back ways of the buildings, heading toward the hotel you two had been staying. Something felt off to you, like someone was watching the both of you. You weren’t sure if he could feel it too, but before you can say anything about this feeling, you see Chrollo quickly thrown into the nearest door next to you both, the door being swiftly shut and locked.

Having no time to react, you’re pushed with immense force outward. Thankfully, you’re able to pick yourself up before taking a fall and you turn to see who it is, already having in mind who it might be.

Hisoka

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter felt soooo long I'm sorry! I had so much I wanted to get through, but I did not want to drag it. Things are gonna get more interesting soon I promise! Things will start to make more sense when I finish getting through all of the readers background I think. 
> 
> And just incase its confusing, I always make the chapter titles a song title that I feel fits with it lol. 
> 
> If anyone has any questions or suggestions, you are free to leave them to my Tumblr linked below! 
> 
> https://hanjiszoee.tumblr.com


	3. The Knife

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You fight Hisoka and reveal your true abilities. Will you succeed?

After all this time waiting, you still weren’t prepared for this moment. Your main target and ticket to the Black Whale were directly in front of you, hands on his hips, confidently waiting for you to cower in fear or make a move.

“You must be Hisoka Morow. Just the person I’ve been waiting to see.” You regained your composure quickly after being pushed by him. Standing up straight and smiling at him, your attitude piqued his interest.

“Hmm.. and you are? Did they already replace the precious lives that were lost? How remarkable!” He rose his finger to his lip and looked off into the corner sarcastically, giving you a condescending laugh. “It doesn’t look like you’re worth much of my time anyhow. Your aura is the weakest I’ve ever come across unless you’re doing that purposefully? Seems unnecessary.”

You were at a much bigger advantage than him. You knew everything about his abilities from what others that had seen it first-hand told you. Hisoka on the other hand knew absolutely nothing about you.

“Hah. I’m not a spider, I was just hired to kill you.” Being direct — but without giving major details — would confuse him more, giving you more time to create a plan for how you were going to defeat him. If you could keep up this conversation for another thirty seconds, you would be set.

“Well that’s just nonsense, I’ve already hired Illumi to do that haven’t I? I have even less of a desire to fight you now. How pathetic.” He now began to make his way to the door where Chrollo was thrown, just ignoring your existence. It seemed he decided you were no match for him or he simply had no desire to fight you. How strange.

Before he could make his way to the door you decided to make a move. In less than a second you put your right arm across your neck and turning to the side, you _conjured_ three sharp blades into your hand. You then lunged your arm outward in a brisk fashion, causing the blades to make it to Hisoka in less than a second.

The moment you conjured the blades, he could sense your spike in aura, giving him a small chance to react. Right before the blades made it to him, he formed **Bungee Gum** to create a shield to catch them, not aware that this would not work.

Those three blades ripped directly through his Bungee Gum, piercing him in both shoulders and the chest. You caught him off guard for the time being. Something like that shouldn’t have been even remotely possible, but for you it was. Nothing should have been able to break through his nen, not even your own, but your ability was so much more complex than that, making it possible.

“Darn, I should have aimed a little higher doncha think?” You smiled, knowing you undeniably caught his attention. You also wanted Chrollo to stay locked in that room so he wouldn’t get in your way or witness your abilities, so you had to get Hisoka away from that door.

“So you _were_ hiding that aura. Now that’s interesting. I’ll bite.” This is where he was wrong, you weren’t hiding anything, but there was no benefit in explaining that. On the outside, Hisoka remained calm and intrigued, but on the inside he was stunned. Many thoughts were racing through his head to try and figure out how you just did that.

Wasting no time, you began to run toward him to bestow another attack. In the middle of your sprint toward him, you disappeared in front of his eyes, causing him to pause from confusion. You then reappeared behind him, attempting to swing another blade at his head, but he sensed your presence and was able to just barely dodge it in a split second. You slightly puncture his cheek before he ducks and then grabs your neck, throwing you forcefully to the wall behind you both.

Your entire body slams against the wall and you fall to the ground. With your entire body aching, you still try to stand up. Your vision is a little blurry, but you manage to get back up on your feet, looking up at Hisoka with enjoyment. That’s right, you were loving every second of this. You prepared for the fact that you might not come out of this fight without some ‘scratches’, but you were confident you would win. Hisoka looked just as excited as you did. Anyone with the potential to wound him as you did was someone worth fighting in his eyes.

“[name], open the door!” You and Hisoka looked over towards the door, Chrollo must have heard the crash in the wall, making him yell out for you.

_Was he worried about you?_ It didn’t matter, because you were determined to kill Hisoka before Chrollo could make it out of that door. Chrollo’s behavior toward you was inconsistent these past two weeks, so whether he was worried about you or just had no intention of seeing you succeed was beyond your caring for now. The only thing you could think about was that boat.

“Aww. Is someone important to the boss? That makes this so much more pleasurable for me. Good.” The blades you had thrown at him prior were still stuck in him and for some odd reason, he decided now was the moment to pull them out, slowly. You saw this as a chance to initiate your ending to this fight, but this would require a couple of careful steps.

Relaxing your shoulders and closing your eyes, you started the process with a simple question. “Hisoka? How are you feeling right now?” You opened your eyes to study his reaction.

He stopped taking out the third blade, “Huh?”

“What are you feeling at this exact moment? Excited? Satisfied? Amused? Maybe even nervous? I think I feel all of those at this very moment.” Your eyes widened and you forced a smile.

He looked concerned for a minute, but then started laughing so hard he threw his head back. “Well, I suppose I feel delighted. Delighted to be the one to kill you. Let me just tell you, you’re lucky I didn’t just kill you to begin with, but now I’m so relieved I didn’t!” You had overheard from a conversation that he just killed Shalnark and Kortopi without warning not long ago, but it seemed his thrill for fighting returned temporarily. 

While making more eerie comments, Hisoka had been using In to connect a strip of Bungee Gum to your leg, thinking you had no idea. You didn’t even need to use Gyo to realize what he was doing. Even with the knowledge that he had Bungee Gum connected to your leg, you allowed him to yank you closer to him. This was extremely risky, but you _had_ to get closer to him to complete your plan.

Finding the perfect moment in mid-pull, you cut yourself free of his ability, but you were close enough to throw a swing at him. Did he forget that you could cut through it? Regardless, he began to dodge multiple swings you continued to throw at him. He was an extremely fast opponent and you knew this would be a problem, but you only needed one opening. Just _one._

After thirty seconds of the same swing-and-miss action, you made an unpredictable move and just took ahold of his arm. Now that you had a hold on him, all you needed was _ten seconds_. Ten seconds and it would be over.

Hisoka assumed you were a conjurer at the start due to your **Instant Blade** ability. Then when you teleported behind him, he assumed he just missed a movement of yours. Both were wrong. Both were abilities of yours, but you were no conjurer, you were a _specialist._

The ability you were attempting to use on Hisoka was **Aura Sponge** , which would allow you to absorb and steal his aura, along with his ability. The conditions of this ability were as follows:

You had to know about or have seen the individual’s abilities. _Done_. You had to know the individual’s real name. _Done._ You had to have the individual confess their emotional state. _Done._ And at last, you had to be touching the individual for at least ten seconds and say their name outlaid in those ten seconds. _Almost done!_

Of course, with any kind of ability, there were multiple limitations to this. The limitations to this ability included:

You can only possess up to three auras in your physical body at once. _You currently obtained two._ When you stole aura, you only gained abilities and strengths/skills along with it, no emotions or behaviors. _This was more of a benefit than a limitation to you._ Each aura you absorbed would be assigned to one of the three tattooed symbols on your forearm, each symbol having no connection to an aura, just acting more as a ‘slot holder’ for each collected aura. And if you tried to exceed your limited slots, one slot would be replaced and you would lose this aura completely, making everything return to the original owner. While these are the main limitations, there are still many more.

Of course when you were to take someone’s aura — or you like to call it their life energy — they would remain extremely weak until it is given back. They have little to no aura afterward, making it impossible for the individual to practice any type of nen. When you steal one's aura, it is combined with any other stolen ones plus your own, making it more powerful upon retrieval. This allows you to alter abilities to make them stronger and do the impossible, like the blades that could cut through Hisoka's ability. This all was the main reason why you were almost undetectable a majority of the time. When you weren’t using these stolen auras, your own aura ceased to exist because it was lost with the others, meaning Zetsu was a nen skill that was unnecessary to use.

With all this in mind, all you had to do was keep your hold on Hisoka for at least ten seconds.

“Hisoka!” You yelled his name to grab his attention in an attempt to stall. “What makes you so sure you can kill me?” You didn’t care at all, you just had to keep talking.

_Four seconds have passed._

He squinted his eyes, looking you in the eyes, then looking down at your hand grasped on his forearm. He had a feeling you were up to something, but he wasn’t sure what.

_Six seconds now._

“Even if you kill me it would have been suuuch a waste. Chrollo has probably already found a way out of that building by now.” A tear formed in your eye, it might have been real from how stoked you were, seconds away from success. “You didn’t know? I was just a distraction.”

_Nine seconds._

While spouting all of that nonsense, Hisoka had spent the past ten seconds trying to calculate your next moves. But it was already over for him. You used your other hand to wipe the tear from your face, then you looked Hisoka directly in his eyes and winked.

_Ten!_

Purple-colored aura rushed from your feet to your head, moving onto Hisoka. He attempted to move, but once the process began, it was unstoppable. Feeling pressure throughout his entire body, he wasn’t able to move at all. After the aura made its way around Hisoka's form, the transfer was complete. Once you knew it was complete, you used your free hand to vigorously punch him, sending him backward around twenty feet. 

Even though you gained someone else’s energy, you now felt exhausted, using this ability took a lot from you ironically.

You looked over to Hisoka, noticing he was nearly unconscious. You walked over to him, standing over him with a faint grin sprawled out across your face. You were almost finished, one more step closer to your brother.

“As much as I’d love to ask what your thinking right now, I don’t have the time to wait for a response.” You could see he was trying his best to compose any energy he could, but he had no idea that all of his aura was temporarily gone.

You conjured a blade and prepared to kill him, not taking any more time to gloat. Before you can kill him you felt an intense pressure on your head and fell over, then you saw nothing. Someone had knocked _you_ unconscious. It was Chrollo.

“And as much as I’d love to watch her kill you, it’s your lucky day.” He had no more to say, he wanted Hisoka dead more than anyone, but something had come up while he was behind that door.

Chrollo picked you up and carried you away, leaving Hisoka laying there, befuddled and powerless. If he had to live, at least he was weak.

-

You opened your eyes slowly, seeing a familiar ceiling at first glance. You were in your bed at your apartment. Looking over, you saw Chrollo in a chair that he moved closer to your bed. He was reading as he usually was.

“How the hell did you know where my apartment was? Stalker.” He looked up from his book with a concerned look. How long had you been unconscious?

“Are you alright? I do apologize about…” He paused and then stood up, setting his book on the end of the bed, “I had to act fast, my words may not have been fast enough.”

“Whatever, is Hisoka dead? Did you just want the kill for yourself? I mean I had no history with him so it’s fine, but I still expect my payment!” You were rambling on and took a glance down at your arm, the third tattoo on your arm was filled in, meaning you still obtained Hisoka's aura. If he were dead, the tattoo would only be an outline, representing a free spot and you’d no longer have his aura.

“You didn’t kill him, did you.” Your eyes moved to his, he looked just as disappointed as you felt. “Chrollo, why?”

“Phinks called to inform me Illumi has been hired by someone else with a better offer to keep Hisoka alive. He is aware of all of our plans and locations, therefore killing Hisoka would have put everyone at risk.” He sighed, “If you would have killed Hisoka, a majority of the troupe would most likely be dead.”

“Do you seriously think he could put up a fight against all of them by himself? Oh please.” You scoffed, you couldn’t believe what you were hearing, “It’s not like it matters, Hisoka is practically useless now. Who the hell would hire him if not Hisoka anyway?”

Chrollo raised his eyebrows and ignored your question, “What do you mean? He did look defeated when I left him, but I’ve _killed_ him before and he came back from the dead. With _more_ power. How could he possibly be useless?”

“He has no aura and can’t practice nen anymore. Because I stole it.” You looked to the corner, avoiding eye contact. You weren’t sure if you should explain any further, but that part of you that still trusted him wanted to. “He will regain energy back eventually, but only to the extent of an average person. An average person who doesn’t have any nen or abilities. He’s useless.”

Chrollo's eyes widened at this information. “You can steal abilities? That’s..”

“No. As I said, I stole his built-up _aura_. His ability just comes with that, which is cool I guess.” You decided to stop explaining there, he already knew too much about you that he didn’t need to. You still knew nothing about his abilities so you owed him nothing.

Chrollos face didn’t show much expression, but you could feel his relief.

“Don’t get too excited now, he could always get it back if he figured out how.” You rolled your eyes, when he doesn’t speak you just keep talking, something you for sure needed to work on. “Can you say something instead of hanging me out to dry here! At least tell me you’re getting me on that boat, I did everything you asked.”

He smiled and sat down on the edge of your bed next to you, “Yes. We can still give you your payment, of course.”

This made you sigh with relief. You took your hand and placed it on his, “Thank you, Chrollo. You don’t understand how much this means to me.” What was it with you both and touching hands?

He looked down at your hands touching, then back up at you. “You’ve only earned it. But I’m coming with you.”

“What?”

“I am going to come with you. They will all probably come, too, if you don’t mind.” All of them meaning The Phantom Troupe.

You were shocked, what benefit would come from them going with you? “Hisoka is most likely going to follow me onto that boat, ya know. It wouldn’t be smart for any of you to come. Why would you anyway? No. Nope.” You shook your head, not being able to tell if this was some ridiculous joke.

“I am not concerned with his whereabouts at the moment, I will not take no for an answer.” His hand moved from under yours and he stood up, moving the chair next to the bed back to its original spot. “We will consider it as just another job for stealing treasure. Some powerful people will be boarding, so it will come to benefit us.”

“I see. It’s your decision I suppose. I have my own business to take care of.” You didn’t like that he was going, but at the same time, this meant you two would not be parting ways so soon. You needed a friend by your side more than ever right now, even if he didn’t consider you one.

“I’m aware.”

You finally got out of bed, making your way over to the mirror on the wall to see the damage. You had some bruising around your chin and head from being slammed against that wall, but other than that you looked fine. You turned to the side, noticing your coat did have a tear in the side, though.

“Oh no. No. Fuck. This was my father’s.” You took off the coat, attempting to look more closely at the tear. This coat was the only thing you could retrieve of his from your childhood home just some time ago.

“I can have that fixed for you, I’ll get it done by the time we leave for the Black Whale.”

You turned to look at him, “Really? Thank you so much. I don’t know anyone in this city for that, I appreciate it.”

“Anything for a friend.”

You smiled as soon as he said those words. Maybe Chrollo did still care for you. Maybe his emotions were still deep down in there. He still considered you a ‘friend’.

“You should join The Phantom Troupe. I think you would be a great fit. They would all love you.” He blurted that out like he had been trying to find a chance to say it this entire time. It came out of nowhere. You looked at him with confusion, you would be a great fit?

You took a seat back on your bed and put your hands over your face, “Stop it.”

“I’m serious.”

“I’m sure they’re all great, really. But I don’t have any desire to steal treasure or— be apart of _that_.” He frowned slightly at your words, “I’m not judging what you guys do, I have no room to actually, but I want to get my brother back and just figure things out. I don’t want that life. And if I remember what you were like as a kid, you don’t want that life either.”

He walked over to the bed and sat directly next to you, “Things change. People change. It’s been a long time, [name].”

He was extremely close to you, this made you feel something you couldn’t explain. What did you feel for him? Did he feel something for you, or was he just being intimate with you to manipulate you? Is this how he treats all of his ‘friends’? 

“Maybe, but I don’t want a part in it. I want to live a more careful life after I get him back.” It’s like if you kept saying it, you’d finally be convinced it was possible.

“Very well. I hope you get what you want, but my offer will always stand if you change your mind.” He sighed and stood up, “I will get your ticket to you and make sure you make it on that boat, safely, in three weeks. You have my word.”

He grabbed your father’s coat off of the bed and headed toward the door, “I’ll talk to you soon.” Opening the door slowly, he took one last look at you and left.

What just happened? You’re now traveling to the Dark Continent in search of your brother with a gang of famous thieves — one of them being your childhood best friend — and you have a murderous, defenseless Hisoka coming after you.

You fell backward onto your bed, now staring into the ceiling.

_Three weeks. Three weeks until you see him again. You’re so close. You refused to let your feelings get in the way of your overall mission._

This was going to be an interesting journey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You finally know more about the readers abilities! There's definitely more, but that's for a later time. Chrollo is also confusing, which I'm trying to do purposefully. I also still feel like these chapters end up being too long oops. 
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading! If anyone has a question or suggestion comments are always appreciated or you can leave them on my Tumblr! 
> 
> https://hanjiszoee.tumblr.com


	4. 3 Libras

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two days before you begin another part of your journey, you dwell on the past.

_CRASH!_

Your eyes shot open and you sat up in your bed, suddenly wide awake. The room was pitch black, the only light entering the room being moonlight from the window. Looking at your alarm clock, you saw the time was 3:45 a.m..

_What was that sound?_

You got out of bed slowly, trying not to make any noise. Walking towards your door, you turned the doorknob as gently as you possibly could. You were unconsciously gritting your teeth as the door creaked open, you could feel something was wrong.

Peering into the hallway, you noticed every door was closed, all except _one_. The door at the end of the hall was ever so slightly cracked, your fathers’ room. You assumed this was where the noise came from.

Tiptoeing, you made it to the end of the hall and put your ear to the door. You held your breath so you could make out what was being said on the other side.

_“I-I had no other choice. You gave me no other choice!”_ Someone was angrily whispering on the other side of the door. It sounded nothing like your father, so who was it? You felt a chill go down your spine. You had to make sure he wasn’t in danger.

Steadily pushing open the door, you kept your stance right outside the doorframe and what you saw on the other side was a ghastly sight. You wanted to let out a scream, but nothing would come out, all you could do was stare. 

Pariston — your brother — was standing right over your father, who was on the floor unconscious. At least you _hoped_ he was unconscious.

Pariston looked over at you in terror, blood splattered across his entire face.

“Dad!” You snapped out of your trance and ran over to his body, immediately putting your hands on him to try and shake him awake. There was blood _everywhere._ You were getting no response from him, making you start to realize the harsh reality of the fact that he was gone. It looked like he had taken a deadly blow to the head, killing him instantly. You moved your eyes to scan the floor around you, noticing a broken vase scattered all around him. This must have been what was used to hit him.

“No… please.” You closed your eyes, trying to hold back the tears that were beginning to form. You had just seen him earlier that day. It made no sense that he was suddenly dead, you kept trying to convince yourself he would wake up any second.

You were afraid to look up at Pariston, who was still just standing there, saying nothing. Your father was your best friend, and now he was dead at the hands of your brother? Why would family kill family?

You finally turned your head and looked up at your brother, who was already looking at you. He didn’t look scared anymore, he just looked empty.

“Pariston… what happened? Is he-? What s-should we do?!” You and your brother didn’t have a close relationship, but you still loved him. He was your _family_ after all. You couldn’t comprehend what could have happened. You wanted to overlook any possibility that he would just murder your father. His father.

“It had to be done.” He was shaking, still looking you straight in the eyes, still covered in blood. He put a hand to his head in distress, grabbing his hair. It seemed he was just as confused as you were, a moment of rage taking him over and ending a life.

Your mother and father were on opposing sides of a brewing war, causing a split in their relationship. Pariston was close with your mother and you were close with your father, meaning you both had two completely different influences. This was why you two weren’t very close, having a conversation now and then. But there was no way that your mother could have wanted this to happen. Every family had their moments and you had hoped for things to get better someday.

While lost in thought, a figure suddenly came rushing in before you could say anything else. It was your mother.

She gasped at the sight, “NO! REI!” Rushing to the body, she pushed you out of the way. While hysterically crying over his body, she abruptly looked up at you, her confusion turning to anger. Her eyes looked dark, you could feel her rage from where you were sitting. Everything was happening too fast.

“Who did this… TELL ME!” You jumped at her words, not sure what to say. You had just discovered the scene only minutes ago.

Pariston began to speak up, probably to take responsibility, but you stopped him. You weren’t sure why, but you had to take the blame for him, you had no clue how she would react to know that he did such a thing. Why were you taking up for someone who most likely hated you?

“It was me!! It was an accident. I’m so sorry. I-I don’t know what even happened I-” It wouldn’t make any sense for you to kill someone so important to you, but she immediately believed it — because she had always hated you, so this was something she wouldn’t put past you. 

Getting in your face, she began yelling at you. “HOW COULD YOU DO THAT?! Do you not understand how much he LOVED you? He… He was delusional… but I WAS GOING TO HELP HIM! I kept telling him there was no hope for you! He would never listen! Why didn’t he listen!!?” After finishing her rave, she grabbed your wrist and began pulling you away from the room. She gave you no time to come up with an excuse.

You looked back at Pariston, his expression was blank. Did he even care about what would happen to you next?

She kept dragging you out of the house until you both eventually made it to her car. She began pushing you into the car, having clear plans of where she was going to take you. It seemed she had been planning to do this for a while.

“Mom, p-please…. let me explain!”

“I’m not your mom. And you’re not my child. I hate you.”

-

Those words shook you awake and you shot up, drenched in sweat. You had the dream _again._

You relive your fathers’ death in your dreams often, usually during more stressful times in your life. You weren’t sure why, but you knew you were sick of seeing it. You tried not to have regrets for taking the blame. It was far too late to change how things happened. You still had no idea why Pariston did that. Much about your family still remained a mystery to you.

This made you feel so alone. Everyone you had grown to love eventually parted ways with you. Sometimes you felt like you died the day your father did.

You now sat on the edge of the bed, taking a second to calm down.

You were boarding the Black Whale in just _two_ days. You hadn’t heard from Chrollo since the day you stole Hisoka’s aura. These past three weeks you had been resting and trying to create a clear plan for yourself. You didn’t stay in your apartment because you knew if you did, Hisoka would find you easily.

Leaning over, you turned the alarm clock to see the time. It was 3:45 a.m.. what a coincidence.

You decided you were going to take a break from being in this hotel. All you had seen for the past month was hotel rooms, you wanted to take your mind off things just for awhile.

You slipped on some clothes, leaving for the first bar you could find on the GPS on your phone.

It was sprinkling outside, so the moment you stepped out you could feel the brisk air hit your skin. It felt nice. All of this time inside made you feel like a prisoner.

The streets were not as busy as they usually were, making the walk to the bar no so overwhelming. The bar you were going to was just right down the street, so it didn’t take you long to get there. Within five minutes you made it to the building.

The outside of the bar was brighter than the rest of the buildings and you could see through the window, there were around three or four people inside. This was good. You just wanted to relax and not push your way through a crowd or make unnecessary small-talk.

As you were about to put your hand on the doorknob, you felt a hand touch the top of your head. You assumed it was either a drunk stranger or someone about to kill you, making you freeze to plan your next move. But it was neither of those things, you slowly turned around to see it was Chrollo. Chrollo?!

“You really are a stalker, aren’t you!” You smack his hand away from your head, “You really know how to scare the shit out of someone.”

“I apologize for scaring you. That wasn’t my intention. What are you doing out so late?” He had a chilled expression on his face as if him meeting you on the street in the middle of the night wasn’t strange at all.

“Ha. I could ask you the same thing.” You turned away from him and opened up the door, walking inside. Of course, he followed you inside, not caring whether you ignored him or not.

Sitting at the bar together, you just ordered the both of you something, since it was obvious he was not going to leave you alone. As usual, he had nothing to say. He was just sitting there, staring at you with those empty grey eyes.

You could no longer handle the awkward silence, “I couldn’t sleep, so I decided to come here to feel at ease. Before I sail away to my death, ya know?” For someone that followed _you_ here, they didn’t have much to say. It irritated you so much when all you did was talk while he said nothing. “But why are you here?”

He looked over at you, finally ready to speak. “I tried calling you a couple of times and you didn’t pick up, so I tracked you.” He said that so nonchalantly like it was normal to track people, especially this late at night.

“Aw! You were worried about me, right? That’s too cute.” You finished off your drink and called the bartender over for more. “You haven’t tried talking to me these past couple of weeks so I wasn’t expecting a call.”

“I have been extremely busy, preparing things and such. You didn’t forget we were all boarding as well, did you?”

“Uhm, I definitely did not forget. What is it you’re wanting to steal, anyway?”

“The Kakin Royal Family is going to be there. They have some things we want.” He didn’t look you in the eyes when he said that, making you feel suspicious.

“Well. If anyone dies I don’t want to hear you blame me. You do realize that you may never even get to come back with any of that stuff, even if you are successful, right?”

“[name], you act as if I haven’t thought this through. My mind isn’t going to change.”

You rolled your eyes, “I’m curious, why is stealing treasure such a priority for you? How did this become your life? I would love to know.” This was never something you thought he would do, when you were kids he had different desires. Now it had seemed he lost all sense of identity. Another part of you did want to convince him not to come because you knew how dangerous this trip would be.

“Maybe someday I can explain it to you if you decide to take up my offer.” As expected, he wasn’t going to tell you anything.

“Well, that’s not happening. So the life of Chrollo Lucilfer shall remain a mystery to me!” Waving your hands around dramatically, you could feel yourself becoming a tad tipsy, you were sure he noticed.

He closed his eyes and quietly laughed, “You’re just as much a mystery. Have you never done something terrible before? Stolen? Killed someone?”

The question caught you off guard, making you look straight ahead instead of at him. “I would rather not speak on it”

“Then why are you judging what I do?” It’s a valid question, one you didn’t have a valid answer for.

“I just care about you. I want you to value your life. I would hate to see you throw it away like I have mine. I know. I know. I’m a hypocrite.” How did you suddenly get so emotional? It had to be the alcohol talking.

“You haven’t thrown away your life just yet. Things will go the way they are supposed to go, you cannot be sure it’s good or bad just yet.” He reached out and put his hand on your back and let it sit there. He could be comforting when he needed to. His calming presence always made you feel comfortable when you were tense like he wouldn’t judge you for anything, unlike how you did to him consistently.

“I wish I could look at it that way. Unlike you, I think everyone has a choice in the way their life goes, and I’ve made a lot of the wrong ones. I have little time to make things right.” Tears were beginning to form in your eyes, your plan of having a relaxing night failed.

“What are you saying? You have plenty of time, you haven’t even made it to the boat yet.” He knew that trying to have a debate about life wouldn’t go anywhere in your state. His hand moved to your hair, gently rubbing your head. “Let me take you back home, I think you’ve had enough.”

You wiped the tears off of your face and turned to face him, “I don’t buy it.”

He furrowed his eyebrows, “What?”

“What are you hoping to gain from this. There’s no way you’re genuinely trying to comfort me. I know you said we were friends… but why would that make any sense?” This was definitely the alcohol talking, making you just say whatever had been on your mind.

He kept looking at you and said nothing. “You discover my true abilities and suddenly I’m your friend again?” You scoffed, “Sounds about right. You probably want me to join the spiders so you can use me to your advantage or something.”

You turned back around, clearly irritated. Once again you had that feeling of loneliness creeping back into you.

“No. You’re wrong. I have no aim to steal or use your abilities.” He gently shook his head.

“….Steal?”

“Well, much like your ability, I can steal others’ nen.” He pulled out a book and sighed, “It all goes into this book.” He was finally ready to share more about himself.

For the next thirty or so minutes, Chrollo explained his abilities to you in full detail. It amazed you that he was so willing to share it with you after you spent all that time judging and questioning him.

“Wow.. that’s so… complicated. W-why are you telling me all this?” You felt disoriented. This feeling could have been from the alcohol or him, but you weren’t sure. If he didn’t want to use you, what did he want? What benefit could he have from re-forming a relationship with you?

“To build trust. That’s what friends do, I believe. It’s only fair since I know all about yours.” You looked at him with disbelief, “I’m not sure what it will take to convince you, but I’m trying.”

“But is it really okay… if I’m your friend? Why would you even want that, with your values now?” You looked down, waiting for a disappointing response.

He gave you an admirable smile, “You’re always so full of questions.” He didn’t want you to know his reasoning. “It’s awful late, can I please take you home?”

You accepted he wasn’t going to open up any more secrets and let it go. But this finally helped you relieve your suspicions and trust he never lost his full sight of altruism.

Nodding your head, you stood up with him. He put some money on the counter and you both began to walk out together. You noticed he didn’t drink anything, just you.

He walked with you until you got to your hotel room. Neither of you had said a word on the way there, but you were glad that was the case. If you were given any more chances to talk you might have said more ridiculous things.

“Thanks for walking with me. I’m not surprised you knew where it was at this point.” He smiled and nodded his head.

He moved his hand and retrieved something from inside his coat, “I almost forgot, this was the reason I was trying to get ahold of you earlier.” He held out a nicely folded coat to you. It was your fathers’ coat that he promised you he would get fixed.

You took the coat from his hands, feeling the soft fabric. “I… I can’t thank you enough for this.”

“It’s not a problem.” He put his hand on your shoulder, “I’ll see you in two days. Goodnight.” He started to walk away, but you grabbed him by his arm to stop him. When he turned back around you embraced him, taking him by surprise.

“I’ve missed you so much.”

He didn’t say anything, but he softly put his hands around you, returning the embrace.

After about a minute, you let him go and said goodnight, watching him leave.

Reuniting with Chrollo gave you a sense of hope. This hope helped you have the confidence you needed to find your brother. Maybe having someone strong by your side would be beneficial for your mission? Maybe you weren’t all alone after all.

You had not seen Pariston in years and you still had so much to discover. Who knew what would be waiting for you on that boat. With Chrollo or not, you had to face it. Even if you couldn’t save your relationship with your brother, you wanted to know the truth.

You wanted to see an end to the war. The war that tore your family apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! If anyone has a question or suggestion comments are always appreciated or you can leave them on my Tumblr!
> 
> https://hanjiszoee.tumblr.com


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